


Become

by potentiality_26



Series: Start Again [2]
Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, F/F, Fix-It, Friendship, M/M, Minor Merlin/Tilde, Missing Scene, Multi, Not Trailer Compliant, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-04
Updated: 2017-06-04
Packaged: 2018-11-03 17:33:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10972065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/potentiality_26/pseuds/potentiality_26
Summary: "No, Harry- I'm not fucking otherwise occupied.  I just have to get people out of their cells, that's all.  Valentine locked up everyone who didn't get on board with his plan.  But let's talk, okay?  I have a minute."Eggsy felt so horribly unmoored.  He wanted to see everyone he had almost lost and everyone he thought he had- Harry, his mum and sister, Roxy, even Amelia- right now and he couldn't.  But he had Harry's voice, and he wasn't letting go of it that easy.After defeating Valentine, Eggsy gets a surprising call.





	Become

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place around the same time as- and then a little bit after- [Start Again](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10829322). As you can see, it's a series now! I have an idea of where I'm going with it next, but it's just an idea so I can't say for sure when there will be more. 
> 
> Not Brit-picked.

Eggsy was glad when Merlin called.

He thought later that night, or the next day, or maybe a week or two on, he would have been grateful to Merlin for interrupting him and Tilde even if it hadn't been good news- the best news- because as he unlocked her door Eggsy had been already aware that he wasn't making very good decisions right then.

After everything that happened, how could he have been?  How could anything that wasn't checking in on the people he loved, seeing with his own two eyes that they were okay, not be something that he regretted when the full extent of V-Day hit him?  It just hit him sooner this way; it plowed into him like a freight train as he realized the one thing that _hadn't_ happened.

He hadn't lost the man he-

Eggsy didn't let himself finish that thought.  He hadn't all through the last day or so, because Harry had been disappointed in him and then _dead_.  And now- when he was apparently neither of those things- Eggsy wasn't sure he knew how to think about Harry at all without getting... overrun. 

He was sitting on the cell floor with his back to the wall, right where he had landed when Merlin first told him about Harry.  He could see Tilde out of the corner of his eye, but he kept his face angled toward the door to avoid giving Merlin and now Amelia another eyeful.  She had just finished throwing on a robe, and there was a growing smirk on her face as she sat back down.  

Did this kind of thing happen to her all the time?

It would certainly explain a few things, Eggsy thought as she took it upon herself to say, "Say hello to your boyfriend for me."  Harry had just told Eggsy he was proud of him- and if Eggsy hadn't already been on the floor, that would probably have sent him there- and Eggsy had just been congratulating himself for not sounding like too much of an idiot.  That was probably a wash now, wasn't it?   

He was glad Harry couldn't see his face, couldn't see how red it had gotten.  There had been times, especially during that twenty-four hours together before everything went to shit, when Eggsy was sure that Harry was just waiting for the right moment to say... something.  Something that would hopefully have brought them closer.  But then Kentucky happened, and Eggsy had to resign himself to Harry being forever an _almost_.  

And now... he didn't quite know where they stood now, but it probably wasn't in the right moment.  "Shhh," he said to Tilde.   

She put her hands up innocently, but failed to look apologetic.  In her defense, she had figured out that he was talking to someone else very quickly and kept quiet for the most part, asking only if he was all right when he first hit the floor.  Now she looked like she was heroically resisting the temptation to say something suggestive again- like maybe ask if Harry shared, which... Eggsy had a feeling no.  And then her smirk softened into a proper smile.  "I will give you a moment alone, yes?"  She stood.  "Perhaps there is a simple way to let the others out of these cells." 

"Yeah, please, thank you," Eggsy choked out.  He felt like an idiot all over again.  She was actually a godsend, wasn't she?  Just what had he been planning to do?  Leave all those people who hadn't agreed to Valentine's evil plan to rot there?

"If you're otherwise occupied," Harry said, "we can talk later." 

And he actually sounded a little... stung.  Eggsy might have taken a touch of perverse pleasure in that, under other circumstances.  As it was, he felt like he had run out of that feeling altogether.  "No, Harry- I'm not fucking otherwise occupied.  I just have to get people out of their cells, that's all.  Valentine locked up everyone who didn't get on board with his plan.  But let's talk, okay?  I have a minute."

Eggsy felt so horribly unmoored.  He wanted to see everyone he had almost lost and everyone he thought he had- Harry, his mum and sister, Roxy, even Amelia- right now and he couldn't.  But he had Harry's voice, and he wasn't letting go of it that easy.  And yet he almost missed how he had felt in the moments before he learned Harry was still alive- almost missed that surreal post-victory high. 

As she waltzed out the door, Tilde teased him one more time: "Maybe you'll get to do it in the asshole after all."

That made Eggsy choke again, but he was actually grateful to her for the remark- because it meant he was distracted once more, thinking about his fever-hot blush and if Harry had heard that, and not how much worse it all could have been. 

"Well," Harry said after a brief silence.  "I doubt either of us are in any shape for _that_ right now.  But I would certainly take a rain check."

Eggsy swallowed.  "You would?"

" _Yes_ , Eggsy."

"Oh."  Eggsy felt elated and terrified and keyed up and exhausted all at once.  He felt like he had been sky diving again and was crashing down to land, except this time he definitely didn't have a parachute.   "Harry, I... I think I might cry, or something."

"That's all right," Harry said.  There was a smile in his voice, but it was incredibly tender, like he had been in a similar state himself, many times.  "It really is.  I’m here.  And I'll stay on the line with you until you sort everything out."

"Yeah."  Eggsy took a deep breath.  "Thanks."

"Any time."

And Harry sounded so gentle and fond as he said it, so... full of hope.   Eggsy wasn't quite sure what to do with that.  All the time he was fighting Valentine’s goons, he hadn't let himself think too much about... anything.  About where he was going, or where he had been.  But he supposed that, in some tiny corner of his mind, it had still been there- the idea that maybe he might get to be a Kingsman after all.  And the way Harry was talking now, he could finally- truly- let himself hope that he would.

Because Harry sounded like he didn't think it was weak, to freak out a little after a day like this.  And he sounded- when he said that he would stick around until Eggsy had sorted everything out- like he really believed that Eggsy _could_. 

“And you’re okay?” he heard himself ask.  Harry had said that he was already, but...

“I’ve had better days,” Harry admitted.  “But it’s… it’s good to talk to you.”

So maybe Eggsy wasn’t the only one who needed a little distraction.  He could hardly blame Harry for it, after what he’d been through.  "Right," he said as he fixed his clothes and pulled himself up.  "So what's next then?"  He opened the cell door. 

"Well, you're quite right that letting the other prisoners out must be first on the agenda," Harry said.  "I believe your efforts will have kept the death toll fairly low, but the calming influence of such people will almost certainly be needed.  Do you think that they'll be able to find their own way home?"

Eggsy frowned.  "Well, there's certainly enough planes here from all Valentine's... guests.  The question is whether we have anybody to fly them out."

"No doubt Merlin is already at work on the problem," Harry said. 

Eggsy agreed.  He poked his head out into the hall. It was quiet now, and empty except for a few bodies, but he found himself... jumpy- probably natural after the day he'd had.  He moved quickly down the hall and rounded a corner, and there was Tilde at a station.

She looked tired but as pretty as ever.  Her robe was slipping over her shoulder a bit, and though he wasn't sorry that they weren't going to know each other any more intimately than they did now Eggsy still liked to look at her.  But look was all he'd do, and judging by the raunchy and yet soft look she shot him, she knew it.  "Feeling better?"

"Yeah," Eggsy said.  He was still jumpy, and he felt... hollowed out and strange- like he couldn't decide whether to run around the room or collapse, burst out laughing or cry.  But still, he was all right, and she was all right.  They all were- surely everything else would eventually be too. 

"Good.  Your wizard friend has been helping me with this, but I could use another pair of hands."

"Merlin?" Eggsy asked the room in general.

Merlin's voice erupted out of a small speaker located at Tilde's station: "I've patched into the base's comm system for the purpose."

"Right, good," Eggsy said.  "Have you figured out how we'll get all of these people home once we let them out?"

"Mmm, yes.  I've investigated the other planes in the hanger, and most do have pilots.  Some even have flight attendants, largely doubling as maids and butlers."

"Why?" Eggsy asked.  He hadn't been this confused in at least an hour. 

Tilde shot him an amused look.

Eggsy heard Harry's soft laughter in his ear.  "You know what kind of people you were dealing with tonight.  Did you really think that none of them would want to bring along their servants to Valentine's brave new world?"

"Oh."  Eggsy looked at the floor, at Tilde, and then back again.  If she found it unsettling to hear him still talking to someone she couldn't hear, she didn't show it.  "And they're... uh... alive?"  Eggsy asked this of the room at large.  He looked at his shoes.  It hadn't occurred to him before, to wonder if anyone in this place hadn't actually been complicit.  He regretted that now. 

"Yes, quite," Merlin said.  "Although they would, after a fashion, have benefited from it, it seems that none of them knew what exactly was supposed to happen today, and so there was no need for the... usual fail-safes.  And since a lot of them still had families at home... Well.  It's safe to say that there are no lingering loyalties for us to worry about."  

"And that's good, right?"

"It's certainly useful," Merlin said.  "We have neither the time nor the fuel to ferry all them home."

"And here I was hoping that I would get to hear more of you," Tilde said, in what Eggsy concluded from his- admittedly limited- experience was her bedroom voice. 

Judging from how sharply Merlin cleared his throat, he shared both the experience and the assessment.  "Why don't we get finished with this?"

The next while passed in rather a blur for Eggsy.  They let all of Valentine's prisoners out- Eggsy would never have imagined, not long ago, that he might meet more than a dozen of the world's most famous celebrities in one go, or that he would have a princess' help him rescuing said celebrities- and loaded them all onto the planes.  Tilde herself bid him farewell with a promise to text and a swat on the arse, and then Eggsy returned to the Kingsman jet, collapsing in his seat.

"It's normal, right?" he asked Harry as Merlin prepared for take-off.  Harry had been on the line with him the whole time- a gentle voice in his ear, an anchor, and a promise for the future all rolled into one. 

"What exactly is 'it'?" Harry asked, sounding fond. 

"Being all-" Eggsy yawned- "exhausted."

"The aftermath varies, in my experience," Harry said.  "But it certainly doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you that a little rest won't fix."

"You sure?"  Eggsy hadn't slept since what happened to Harry in Kentucky; he hadn't wanted to, and even knowing that Harry was safe after all a part of him still didn't.  What if he dreamed about Harry dying again?  What if he woke and didn't know which was the dream, that or _this_?

"Quite sure.  And I'm just a call away, if you need me." 

And now that he mentioned it, sleep did sound like a very good idea.  Eggsy settled into his seat a little more, but he still hesitated.  “What about you?   Will you be all right if I go to sleep?”  

“I will,” Harry assured him, voice oh-so-soft and affectionate.  “And I’ll see you soon.” 

“Okay,” Eggsy said.  “See you soon.”

He wasn't sure how quickly he dozed off, but it seemed to happen between one breath and the next.  He slept well, and didn't dream that he could remember, and when he woke he felt better- better and _warm_ , a lot warmer than he thought the plane's heating system could justify.  He realized that there was someone pressed up against him, and that there was fine hair in his mouth. 

He shifted a little, wriggling around until he could see Roxy, lying half on top of him.  Honestly, just looking at her made him feel even better than talking to Harry had. 

And she looked fine- she looked _great_ \- but he still asked, "You okay?" when he noticed that his movements had jarred her awake and she was blinking sleepily at him.

"Just tired," she said.  "I went to space, you know."

Eggsy blinked a little himself, sitting up in his seat.  "Can't believe I slept through us picking you up."  He couldn't believe he'd slept through her cuddling up to him either, but he thought it was maybe too early to draw her attention to the cuddling. 

"We're still on the ground refueling, if it helps."

"Dunno if it does," Eggsy said.  "Hey- my mum sounded okay when you last talked to her, right?"  He had asked Roxy to call her, both before the signal started and after it stopped.  He had no doubt she had done as he asked, but he wanted to hear her say it.   

"She did," Roxy said.  "She's fine."

"Good.  Thanks, Rox."

"Anytime."  She nudged his arm.  "How are you holding up?"

Eggsy shrugged.  "Seriously, I think I should be asking you that- you went to space, right?  And there's uh- plenty of room on this plane, isn't there?  And yet you're on top of me." 

Maybe it was still too early to mention it, because Roxy stiffened immediately and moved. 

Luckily tiredness hadn't dulled Eggsy's reflexes too much.  He grabbed Roxy's wrist before she could go far.  "I don't _mind_ , Rox.  I just think it maybe means you're having a hard time.  And if you are, I think maybe you should tell me about it.  I mean, I'm only keeping it together this well because Harry talked me through the worst of it."

"Did he?" Roxy asked, relaxing slowly.

The interest in her tone sent a clear message: she wanted to change the subject, to work up to what was going on with her- if indeed they talked about it at all.  "Yeah," he said.  "He's alive, did you hear?  And he's... he's okay, you know?"

"I heard," Roxy said quietly.  "We're going to go get him before we fly back to HQ."

Eggsy barely managed to bury a sigh of relief.  He had been sure he would see Harry soon, but he was grateful it would be that soon.  He wanted to get home, but he still felt... off.  "Seems like everything worked out okay," he said when he put his finger on why.  "And I'm not... used to that.  Doesn't seem like it should be possible."

"I know how you feel," Roxy said.  Her expression was very... full, suddenly.  Eggsy still couldn't read Roxy as well as he would like, so he wasn't sure what that look was about.  She hesitated, briefly, and finally said, "It was Amelia who told me that you and Merlin would be coming for me, and about Harry.  She's okay too."

Eggsy looked at his hands, suddenly embarrassed.  "Yeah," he said, a little sheepishly.  "Kinda knew that.  Harry told me after the final test."

Roxy elbowed him, not hard.  "And you didn't think to mention it?"

"Well- things got a little crazy after that.  And... well- I didn't think you, you know, cared."

She elbowed him again, but with even less intent.  "Of course I cared."  She went quiet a second time, leaning close and picking at his lapels.  "I've been preparing for Kingsman half my life.  And when the dormitory flooded, I knew right away that it was test.  And just like that, all I could think about was making sure I did everything right.  And I did- I did everything right.  Except I missed something much more important."

"Hey," Eggsy said, realizing that they might have reached the root of what was bothering her.  "You ain't the only one." 

He had thought seriously about quitting that night, and he hadn't as much to show Charlie up as to make Harry proud of him.  Even so, even after the grueling weeks that followed, when Harry had told him Amelia was a plant he had felt such relief along with his embarrassment- relief that she wasn't gone after all.

Relief that someone innocent hadn't died because his mind had been on survival only.    

"No," Roxy agreed.  "But I _am_ the one who..."  She trailed off.

Eggsy wasn't sure what that meant, but he had a feeling it was important.  "The one who what?" he asked. 

"Never mind," Roxy sighed.  Important or not, Eggsy decided he could let it go for a bit, because she did continue: "I just... buried it.  Everything I felt about what happened.  And now, now that it seems I didn't make such a terrible mistake after all, it's like all those things I was trying so hard not to feel are... hitting me all at once."  She shook her head.  "It doesn't make sense."

"It makes sense to me," Eggsy said, nudging her gently.

Roxy soon recovered what little composure she had ever abandoned.  She moved away from him, sitting back in her seat.  "So.  When we get back home, are you and Harry going to..."  She waggled her eyebrows in a way that reminded Eggsy of Tilde- scarily so, considering what they had almost done. 

Eggsy thought about that.  "We're gonna go out," he said, "and see where it leads." 

He thought Harry probably only alluded to more than that the way he did to startle him, to lighten the mood.  He thought Harry probably wouldn't mind taking things slow when the future was still so uncertain. 

"Why?  You and Amelia gonna..."  He waggled his eyebrows in turn. 

It was mostly a joke- Eggsy hadn't yet managed to establish how Roxy's tastes even ran, though her flirting choices at that club before they all woke up tied to those train tracks had made him wonder- but judging from the way Roxy straightened up suddenly he was actually a lot closer to the truth than he had anticipated. 

 _Wow_. 

"I don't know," she said slowly.  Her lips ticked upward into a tiny, almost shy smile.  "But... maybe yes?"

Eggsy laughed, delighted.  "So you two are-"

"I don't know," Roxy said again, an easier admission that time.  "We saw a lot of less of each other than you and Harry did, remember.  I just... I thought there was... something.  Between us."  That little smile broadened.  "And it seems like maybe she thought so too."

"We should go on a double date," Eggsy declared.

Roxy sputtered and made a retching noise.  "Ugh, Eggsy."

He was only half kidding. "It's sitcom material, honestly.  Two spies and their lately-resurrected also-spy dates." 

She laughed reluctantly.  "Maybe sometime," she said, and Eggsy liked that- not just the double date idea, but everything.  That whole vision of the future.  Roxy put her head back on his shoulder and left it there.  "Everything's going to be different when we get back, isn't it?  In Kingsman.  In the _world_."  

"Guess so," Eggsy said, thinking about all the things that had happened in that bunker- and all the things he planned to make happen after they landed.  With Harry.  With his family.  His life was going to be unrecognizable once he was through.  He wasn't at all sorry about that.  "But we'll figure it out."

"Together?" she asked.

"Yeah," he said.  "Together."

**Author's Note:**

> Come see me on [tumblr](http://potentiality-26.tumblr.com/).


End file.
